On Knowledge and Action

A little knowledge that acts is worth infinitely more than much knowledge that is idle.

Kahlil Gibran

Have you ever experienced the pleasant sensation of something “clicking” in your brain when you “put two and two together” or when you discover something that “makes sense” or read about some new concept that makes you go “Aha!”? For me it is an emotional, physical, and spiritual sensation that can be very addictive. It makes me terribly inquisitive, an avid reader, and an eternal student.

Every day I have to have my “fix” of knowledge, discovery, or learning and I become cranky and despondent if I don’t get it. Well, this morning I thought I’d write some profound reflections on this subject, but instead decided to work on putting up some pictures and organizing my new apartment. I spent all day and night on the project of building a homey atmosphere where I can thrive and grow for as long as it takes. Now it is past one AM and I’m exhausted but relaxed and thrilled with the results of my work. My little place is cozy and warm and, although I’m not done settling in, I know I am going to be happy here.
So what did I learn today? Not something I researched on the web or a book, but the result of my experience of getting out of my usual intellectual pursuits and into the physical construction of the place I know I need. Years of introspection, reflection, study, and learning about who I am and the circumstances I’ve been living under led to my discovery that I had to make some radical changes in my life. I had known it for years but somehow I intuitively knew the time had come and I was ready to take the leap. That little knowledge that I needed to act and that I had all I needed to do it has made a bigger difference in my life than all the knowledge I had acquired during my lifetime but had yet to act upon. Perhaps that is what KG had in mind in the quote above.
In spite of all that I know about relationships, especially about my own marriage, I keep hoping that my husband will discover what his true needs are and acts on getting them met. Meanwhile, I struggle to learn how to be a good friend to him without being an enabler and trying to rescue him. I know I also have to learn how to care for myself in a healthy and committed way.
How much inaction on my part will it take for him to take charge of his life? After almost 40 years together, old habits die hard. I know it won’t be easy for either one of us to learn what we need to. To muster the courage to act on at least a fraction of that knowledge is quite a different thing altogether!